Benjamin Otu EffiwattLet’s be real — lazy girl era was comfortable. Like really comfortable. We’ve been told to hustle our lives away for so long that suddenly “not giving a f*ck” sounded amazing. We were exhausted from saying YES to everything. We needed a break. We deserved it.
And so we took it. But at what point did taking a break become doing… absolutely nothing?
At some point, taking care of ourselves stopped looking like relaxing on the weekends and started looking like: not paying your bills on time, scrolling through Instagram until 2am instead of sleeping, skipping the gym and never going back, eating out for every single meal.
WHY THE LAZY GIRL ERA FEELS SO GOOD (& Why It Stops Working)
When I first realized I needed to pull myself out of lazy girl energy, I was met with serious resistance. Like, what are you talking about? This is my peaceful happy place — type of resistance.
I understand why we fell into this cycle. We were told we had to do more with less time than ever before. We were pushed into hustling our lives away by a society that worships productivity for the sake of productivity.
For a lot of women who had been giving 110% for years, lazy girl energy was healing.
But everything is healing until it stops serving you. And eventually, pushing yourself to do nothing stops serving you too. It’s easy to confuse rest and rejuvenation with laziness and lack of motivation. They may look similar on the outside, but they have completely different effects on your mind and body.
SIGNS YOU’RE READY TO EXIT THE LAZY GIRL ERA
Some people will naturally come out of lazy girl era before others, and that’s totally okay. Life has no set timeline and everyone moves at the pace that’s best for them.
But if you’re reading this, I know that a little voice inside of you is ready for change.
You might be coming out of lazy girl era if:
1.You feel bored more often than you feel rested.
When you’re genuinely resting, you feel like you actually need to relax. When you’re just lazy, you feel bored because there’s nothing meaningful going on in your life.
2.You have more goals than you do motivation.
Having goals is great, but unless you’re taking steps to reach them, they’ll start to feel impossible. The older you get without acting on your dreams, the further away they seem.
3.You find yourself comparing yourself to others more.
When you have no motivation to work on yourself, it’s easy to spend all your time watching other people do things. When you’re scrolling Instagram and feeling down about everything you’re not doing, you’re probably ready for a change.
4.You’ve noticed your self-esteem decline.
This one is sneaky because you don’t notice it right away. When you stop challenging yourself, you subconsciously tell yourself that you aren’t capable of reaching your goals. Once you start believing that, it becomes very hard to shake.
5.Rest no longer feels relaxing to you.
If you spend a whole weekend doing absolutely nothing and wake up feeling more tired than before, you’re likely living too much in your head. When you’re anxious about the things you’re not doing, laying around won’t ever truly feel restful.
HOW TO EXIT THE LAZY GIRL ERA (& Find Motivation Again)
I promise you it’s worth it. And you don’t have to jump back in swinging. We spent years overdoing it — it’s time to give ourselves permission to slide back into life at a gentle pace.
Here are 7 simple steps to help you transition out of lazy girl energy and into your intentional self.
1.Start ridiculously small
We have to take the opposite approach if we want lasting change. You’re not going to hop out of bed tomorrow motivated to grind your life away — and that mentality is what put you in lazy girl energy in the first place.
Start tiny. If you try to do too much too soon, you’ll quit.
Do this instead: make your bed every morning, drink a full glass of water before your morning coffee, or go for a 10-minute walk. Add ONE thing to your daily routine. Once that feels like a habit, add another. Tiny habits lead to big results.
2.Identify what you actually want
One of the things we lost while lounging in lazy girl energy is our passion. We spent so much time avoiding things we didn’t care about that we forgot how to identify what we actually did want.
Take time to sit with yourself and brainstorm. What lights you up? What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? What do you imagine your life looks like when you’re daydreaming? Write down your answers — this is your motivation waiting to be unleashed.
3.Fix your environment before fixing yourself
Your environment plays a huge role in your behavior. A cluttered bedroom, a messy desk, a phone full of distracting apps, and people around you with no goals — none of that makes motivation easy to find.
Clean up your space. Clean up your digital life. Be intentional about who you surround yourself with. When your environment mirrors the person you’re becoming, everything else starts to fall into place.
4.Don’t wait until you feel motivated
This was a game changer for me. I used to wait until I felt motivated to do things. But the motivation comes after you do the work — not before.
You have to show up before you feel like showing up. Start doing the things even when you don’t feel like it, even if you feel awkward, even if you’re not great at it yet. Showing up is the first step. The more you do it, the easier it becomes.
5.Create a simple daily routine
You don’t need to wake up at 5am and knock out hours of work before your day starts. But you do need a simple, laid-back routine that you actually look forward to.
Wake up thirty minutes earlier than usual and spend that time intentionally — before you check your phone. Suggestions: journaling, stretching, reading, or planning your day. Whatever fills you up and makes you feel intentional. Do that.
6.Be honest about what you’re avoiding
Until you get real about why you fell into lazy girl energy in the first place, you’ll keep feeling stuck. Something is holding you back from doing the things you say you want to do.
Make a short list of things you’ve been pushing off and vow to do one of them this week. Doing the things you’ve been avoiding releases a huge weight off your shoulders — and gives you more energy than you ever thought possible.
7.Celebrate progress, not perfection
A lot of us fall back into lazy girl energy because we try to leave it too quickly. We decide to change, try to do everything at once, have one off day, and call it quits.
Progress is not linear. You’re going to have good days and bad days. Don’t beat yourself up over the bad ones — just promise yourself you’ll do better the next day. Progress beats perfection every single time.
FAQ
How long does it take to get out of lazy girl energy?
Everyone is different and it’s going to take you however long it takes you. Some will notice a shift in a couple of weeks while others may take a few months. Don’t rush yourself — you’re building lifelong habits here, and Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Can I still rest if I’m coming out of lazy girl energy?
Of course! Rest is good and you should absolutely take time to relax when you need it. The difference is intentional rest versus using rest to numb yourself from the things you’re avoiding.
What if I slip back into lazy girl energy?
Slipping is part of the process. When it happens, ask yourself why. What triggered you to go back to old habits? The more you pay attention to your triggers, the easier it becomes to stay on track. Each time you catch yourself slipping and choose yourself instead, you’re becoming stronger than you were the day before.
Final Thoughts
Hey, beautiful person reading this.
I know doing the things feels overwhelming. But you know what else feels overwhelming? Life when you let yourself crawl back into lazy girl energy.
You are amazing, capable, and deserving of everything you desire. But first, you have to show up.
Come out of lazy girl energy one small step at a time. Start today and never look back.
You’ve got this.
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